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Thursday, October 25, 2012

Thoughts at rest seem to stay at rest, thoughts in motion tend to stay in motion

Thursday, October 25, 2012 @ 10:55 AM

Linda didn't say too much about the new shoes ... Thought she'd like them :(

Good morning.  This is me and we’ve been up for only about 2-3 hours.  We spend a few moments with Linda, but then she had to be moving.  We have just finished checking out our morning tasks on the computer.  We’ve read over yesterday’s entry several times and still find ourselves someone cast over its spell.  We’re going to try moving on.  We did leave a note on Twitter and FB and a few FB friends were very supportive in helping us grasp the meaning of living in the moment and not mentally overloading.  I don’t think they said it just like that, but I think they really meant to help us in not overthinking something that was out of our control. 

We haven’t yet gotten to the point that we are moving on too fast literally with the day.  It is rainy outside so there are muted sounds coming from the balcony door area.  There is construction happening about a half block away, or at least the roadwork for updating the vacant land, and there is sounds from the quarry a mile or two away.  We rarely think of it until we’re given the right atmospheric pressure to be hearing machinery from distance.

We’ve had our afternoon popcorn.  Ok, just barely in that time frame – more LATE morning than early afternoon, but it seemed to be the thing to do AND we’re done drinking coffee for the day so figured it go with moving on to an ice cold glass of pop.  Did I say anything ran here on standards?  I think not!

There should be ways to move past the ideas in our head.  It is Thursday, right?  Dr. Marvin isn’t going to be in for the next couple of days.  We’ll talk to him again on Tuesday.  It seems like a long time, but on the more sane side of things we’re still looking forward to meeting our Grandson and Laura.  It is going to happen just three days from now.  We have to keep that in perspective so we’re in good Ann shape to be handling it.  That probably means getting back into our body again, and not so much our thoughts, but then here we are one being … and though many minds, still just one being and we have to be putting ourselves forward in some manner that’s progressive. 

Maybe we are into some kind of routines when things like this happen and we’ve been mentally gone for a couple days.  I’m pretty sure domestic Goddess work is in order.  Thinking we should look around.  The bed isn’t made, there are things to put away in the living room, clothes are in need of attention including the five clothes that Rich put out for us to be steamed.  I’m pretty sure there are dishes on the counter and I’m thinking the sewing table AND the drafting table are out of sorts.  Yup, yup … garbage needs to be taken out and floor vacuumed.  Sometimes our life can be so trustworthy.  We know for example if we don’t do things like this … they stay that way.  Seems the only thing we can do is get it back to order and then maybe because of that silly commercial that keeps coming back to our mind, “Things at rest, seem to stay at rest, while things in motion tend to stay in motion.”  Have you heard that one?  Maybe its for something like Cymbalta … checking that out.  Hmmm, seems to work with chronic low back pain and chronic Osteoarthritis pain. 

That’s like us!  We’ll have to talk to Dr. Marvin about it.  It says that it is not a NSAID.  It says that it is a treatment of major depressive disorder, and generalized anxiety peripheral neuropathic pain in addition to the musculoskelateal pain … seems like something we should ask about, but thinking that Dr. Marvin might defer it to Dr. Albright.  We haven’t seen our regular doctor for over a year because of problems with billing, but we might call and ask if we could come in.  We usually wait though until there is a definite reason to.  I think this medicine has good advertisement if it is getting me to think about it.  My preference would be that it be against the law to sell medicine to patients, before doctors recommend it.  Because here we are thinking we need the stuff AND our doctor hasn’t said so.  Girl … I think you are heading down the wrong path.

Let’s get back to the thought of things in motion tend to stay in motion?  Maybe we could look at clothes tomorrow, but start elsewhere on that list … this would then be like Ann rebooting again, right?

Let’s look first at the Living Room – particularly the drafting table.  If we could clear that up, we’d be more likely to go back to the cutting of fabric work we left behind 3-4 days ago, hmm?  GO!

Ok, good good … that’s a start.  We worked as long as our back tolerated and got ALL the LR picked up and vacuumed (including the drafting table) … it’s not really much more than about ten minutes of work, but it’s at the peak of our tolerance level without taking a break.  I know just is.  Next will be working in the bedroom to make the bed and prepare a load of clothes to go downstairs tomorrow morning.  That be a good deal … AND if we were really working well we’d do the steaming of shirts, right?  Ok, maybe not that much, but definitely finishing the work in the kitchen and sewing room.

Ok, that’s lined up … and we’ve bought ourselves about 15 minutes so what is next to be thinking through?  We are feeling a little better just making this much progress.  One of the silly things we did this morning, but seemed necessary was that we got someone in the system their horoscope reader on the phone again.  We’d lost it when switching from Sprint to Verizon phones.  It took a little scouting, but we eventually found the right one.  We had liked it over anything else we’d seen in our lives.  I know it’s silly and on the days that it gives negative stuff we try to ignore it, but then there are other days where it says good things are happening and we then probably work a little harder to make that happen. 

This morning it said:

People who have become lost in the desert – suffering from great thirst and heat exhaustion have been known to experience mirages. The mirages might involve the water and shade they craved, and perhaps a friendly person who was there to save them.  The mirage was real to the person because he or she was absolutely physically and emotionally desperate.  You may want to believe something right now.  It’s not such a desperate situation as above, but there is a longing you hope to fulfill, and so you’re telling yourself that what you’ve found is “it” but something very real and far better awaits you, if you can be more open to the possibilities.

The nice thing about horoscopes is that they give you mind imagination to roam.  We’re thinking this morning since we’ve been longing for the relationship with an old friend who’s very smart and seems to have it all – including a sort of mental stability, that that is our craving … to be smart, active and mentally stable – and it’s just this person represents it in our life.  So the “it” might not be her, but there might be something that will assist in something more real if we are open to “the possibilities”  We know that this other person has moved on with her life and she always seems busy and with newer friends.  We can take from this situation the ideal she represents in our life and still be ok with the part where we have Rich.  It is not so much a denunciation of him, or our lifestyle, it’s more just that I want to be more in life than this person sitting back on a disability and providing nothing beneficial to mankind.  I know it probably seems silly too … just doesn’t everyone want to contribute something of him or herself forward?

We just ran into another situation.  A couple of weeks ago, Maury and Nikki told me that Ame would have a band concert today and we had forgotten.  It would mean that we’d have to leave the house about 5 pm, and so then be in the shower in about 3 ½ hours.  I would like to go for Ame and the kids, but then I know I’m not in good shape yet either.  It is good that we started to move ourselves forward with the cleaning and picking up, but it means that we’d have to go fully forward and pretty fast with it to get our thoughts in the right kind of order to be leaving the house on our own – with both the drive and walking into a place crowded with people.  We’ve done it in the past, but usually we remember closer to the event and have a clearer path toward getting there.  I wonder what Rich is doing?  I think he said something about seeing Christopher this afternoon/evening.  I better check.

AHA!  That helps a lot.  Rich said he might be seeing his son earlier and that he’d have to leave by 4 pm, but he thought he might be able to go with me.  That would help a lot because I wouldn’t have to worry so much about driving and parking and I’d have him there to help me get through the crowdedness.  We left a message for Maury to let him know that we were going to try being there.  Rich had to put some other things in motion, but he’s going to give me a call back as things progress, BUT the general idea would that we get to go!  I feel really bad.  The first part answered is this important?  That was NOT the question to be asking one’s son about his daughter.  Of COURSE it’s important you NUT!  Ok, let’s not be calling each other names.  We know that there are parts that love this sort of thing and will make it right in the end, it’s just that there’s no backing out of our processes that are going to get us from this moment to that one.  We will without a doubt be happy if we can do it and we love to send encouragement out to Ame to be continuing her work in learning the violin.  We’re so proud of the kids when they put their hearts into doing something a little more to stretch their minds and abilities.  It’s a GOOD Ame!

Ok, pretty sure Ame couldn’t do wrong, but just saying GOOD!

We’re figuring that the time has gotten also past five minutes so we’re going to check out the bedroom and make sure everything is put right, brb

Oh man did that hurt, BUT we got both the bedroom and the kitchen picked-up and started the dishwasher too.  That certainly had to get started.  I couldn’t fit one cup or one brownie pan though it appears Rich had it soaking.  Good Rich!

There things went full circle ALMOST … we did just talk to Maury again.  He obviously likes it better when Rich is there because then he doesn’t have to worry about me driving in the dark.  My getting all the parts together to drive on the expressway is always a task in a half.  We have parts that don’t have any trouble with it, but they don’t deal with any of our lower-ordered shenanigans.  Yup yup … we are the parts that grumble about starting the dishwasher.  I know how hard could that be.  Most people do it without even thinking on the way to something much more demanding than getting through the day.  But, then this is part of our problem we’re not most people.  We’re just us. 

Maury seemed happier that we were making the effort and we apologized for the other part and thanked him for jump-starting our day.  He laughed he said that’s what kids are for and that they jump-started their day all the time.  Hehehe – Hey … we did our share of parenting – now it’s your turn!  And, yes the very least a grandparent can do is to honor the accomplishments of said Granddaughter!  Maybe there will be ice cream after too?  That’s the kind of thing I would want to do after an event like this.  I know that kids get excited to be performing and no one wants to exactly JUST go home afterward.  There should be some kind of congratulations, right!??  Ok, we’re starting to perk-up here.  We will just have to convince Rich it’s a good idea too … USUALLY Maury is up to it with his girls!

Hi … we’re back again … it’s about 4 pm.  I’m not sure what happened with the time.  We know we took a shower, and the house is taken care of. 

I really don’t know what we’ve been doing.  The last thing I did before opening this document again was I checked the email, facebook and Twitter.  It seems it hadn’t been too long since we checked because there wasn’t much new stuff up.  I suppose the next thing would be to figure out how much time we lost. 

Last time we noted a time in our writing was about 12:30 pm when we were figuring out our shower … and now it is 4 pm.  I know we took our shower, cleaned our house … Hmm, I know one thing that would have been a time stealer … we watched 2-3 quilting shows.  That’s then probably where most of that time went.  I think we were looking for something on Applique hoping to pick up some new information.  I’m not sure if we learned anything we needed to do, but at least most the time is accounted for right?  I think Rich was going over to his son’s and was going to leave there at about this time and it should take him about an hour to get home, plus he will be late so I’m thinking he’ll get her in about an hour and a half (5:30 PM) And, that will leave about an hour to get to Ame’s concert.  Our day really did change about that point.  We’re now grateful to be going. 

Just that it is kind of warm, dark and cloudy outside.  I didn’t remember moving the curtains, so I’m guessing they’ve been open since Rich left.  Just one curtain open half way.  Did we eat popcorn yet?  Thinking maybe before noon.  I think Rich needs more variety around here.  We’re thinking that we’re going to miss normal dinner so we’re preparing ourselves in case Rich doesn’t schedule in dinner until after the concert.

We’re trying to catch up with our time.  We got dressed and ready to go.  It’s about 4:45 PM.  Rich just called about 15 minutes ago and I think he is another 30 minutes out.  I got confused with time again.  Sometimes we just stray away from ourselves and it is hard to pick-up on exact times.  You know one part does something and being in the area another part will do something and eventually you sit down, and you are face the keyboard and Word Doc, but you don’t really know what all you did.  Maybe even normal people have this happen to them. 

Whoops it was only 15 minutes and he’s already home.  He’s getting cleaned up and we need to drink an Herbalife Shake, because it’s too much for him to eat yet.  It works.  He says he will be ready in another 15 minutes.  We’ll call Maury when we are on the road.  It sounds like we’re going to get there in plenty of time.  Just gotta pace myself with this drink, because I usually take my time.  They are like drinking a real shake and can freeze up your insides in minutes.

We made an executive decision with our Twitter account … we took a name off our list.  It is a multiple and I would like to think we are open to anyone, but this particular one added a comment every 5-8 people.  Her message was usually very negative and spoke derogatively of her family, household and life in general.  I was avoiding looking at the multiples column because she seemed to be there with another negative statement each time I looked and she must really sit on Twitter all day.  I just couldn’t do it anymore.  It should be ok, I don’t owe anything to anyone, just it feels bad to give-up on a person.  I wasn’t interested in building a relationship to her and the best I could do was to take my own negative mindset of her away.  Sometimes it just helps not to think about things that are disturbing.  Maybe someone will do that to me sometime too, but all you can say is sorry.  It was a boundary crossing I could no longer disregard.

Maybe we’ll look at that again … but, now time for the concert … well in like 5 minutes … we still need to post and Rich is closing his eyes for a few moments.  I think he had a hard day … we’ll soon find out. 


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