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Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Ok, the deal is that we gotta get on board with our life plan. What is next?





Tuesday, January 29, 2013 @ 9:14AM

Good morning – this is us.  We’ve been up for almost two hours and have spent the morning talking with either Rich or Linda.  Both of them have moved on with their day too.  We also wanted to leave a note on the day that the weather is rainy out there, but 61 degrees at the end of January.  It’s just unreal.  Soon there will be no reason for the “snowbirds” to be moving south.  We just saw a picture at Linda’s which showed too that where she lives in WI has no snow either.  It’s just pretty crazy stuff.  So far we’ve had only two days the snow stuck overnight and then it melts right away.  I’ve only had to scrape my car windows once.  Really am not going to complain about that although Rich might point out that he needs snow to help his lake water level rise.  Those kinds of problems I can’t do much with so have to just nod and move-on.

Last night we did some more on the ironing while Rich was watching TV, and then we retired early together … that’s ALWAYS nice!  Good Rich!

I don’t think we saw much in the line of TV with him.  I think his last show was downright silly and we both let it go before finishing.  I think sometimes he just needs those moments to sit in his chair and maybe even rock a little bit.  It’s good for him to get his mind off business so he can face it in the morning.  We’re leaving a note as to this morning’s business meeting with him a bit on the sorrowful side.

Basically, yesterday we had helped him by looking up some names as possible business contacts and we’d written to them through their contact forms or emails.  It was just a little bit.  We found 11 names.  The unfortunate part was that in dealing with those contacts today, Rich got mad at us because we weren’t able to put up with the negativity.  Maybe that’s not why he was raising his voice directly, but it was our take on it.  We were complaining because businesses looked for things like a FEIN number, a Dun and Bradstreet number, insurance numbers, square footage of his facility, number of employees and things that Rich had some kind of problem with or another.  It almost felt like he was killing the messenger.  I think he tries to find smaller businesses than we were finding and that was frustrating, because then he added all the little complications like time that follow-up was going to cause him and the quality of his business in that the people he has working for him in the “workshops” aren’t high enough quality or can produce as efficiently as the bigger customers need.  It was like how can we do business this way?  We need to be more solid, but then that frustrated him because he says he’s been doing his business fine for over thirty years.  But, then we were like if it is so good how come we aren’t doing better.  Basically, we’re just over the point of covering his $3000 alimony.  We’re still at that negative point that she is making more than he is as to money one or the other can count as income toward debt. 

ARGH!  I know same-o-same-o!

We couldn’t really handle helping very much before we were complaining about all the potholes he was leaving and it just didn’t make sense or feel good to us.  I have to admit too there are reasons we are on disability.  We can only handle so much frustration and then we have to find something that is calmer or more positive.  Rich’s way of looking at it is that he hasn’t ever in his life been to too many meetings where things were all positive.  Usually, he said they were fraught in problems.  Just that he seemed to have so many that it affected our positivity and then we just felt ourselves plummet toward depression.  We just wanted to hide. We just can’t afford all that … or maybe, we just need to take breaks from it.  I don’t know if we’ll be able to do any help for him today, but if not … that will be ok too.

So again … I think we have to move on right now.  Maybe a little more then we’ll stop.  I just wanted to leave a little marker as to what we had done for him.  Basically, he’d been mentioning that the person he needs to talk to in business is either the procurement guy or the purchasing guy.  So we went online to one of the career/help wanted sites.  This one happened to be “careerbuilder.com.”  Then we entered in “manufacturing, purchasing-procurement, and Chicago,” and the site gave us a list of 376 jobs found.  We ended up on page 3 of 16.  Most have a company name, and from there we went to the company’s web site.  We looked for their contact information and filled in their request for information forms, or we went to their email if they listed one.  We basically put in the same email form Rich uses for business.  The longer version reads like this:

Prykop Packaging & Assembly
Brookfield IL
312-907-0071
             
WE ARE A SOLUTION!   To your Packaging and Assembly needs


PP&A, a division of Prykop & Associates, has been providing job shop services to Business/Industry in necessary secondary operations for over 30 years. We offer a viable work force equipped to economically handle short, intermittent, or long-term projects on a pre-set production schedule. We accomplish this with tight supervision, quality control, efficient communication, problem-solving abilities and extra assurances of meeting the customer’s demands and needs. FDA REGISTERED

Assembly                    
Gift Assembly            
Light Machine Work
Basket Assembly
Bagging                       
Envelope Stuffing     
Hot Melt Gluing              
Skin Packaging
Display Packaging     
Sealing
Blister Packaging          
Bin/Tub washing
Letter Addressing      
Quality Inspection     
Food Reconditioning
Poster Rolling
Sorting                         
Shrink Wrapping       
Sample Kits                    
Retail Packaging
Labeling                       
Stapling
Weight Counting            
Rework


PPA is located within easy access of the highway network in several areas throughout the Chicago land Area, with a strong and flexible work force, Free cost and time estimates are provided. Please contact us for more information at 312-907-0071 or by e mail.


Thanks,
Rich Prykop
312-907-0071
http://packaging.prykop.com/

And, the shorter version looks like this:

Prykop Packaging & Assembly - Brookfield IL
                     
WE ARE A SOLUTION!   To your Packaging and Assembly needs

PP&A, a division of Prykop & Associates, has been providing job shop services to Business/Industry in necessary secondary operations for over 30 years. We offer a viable work force equipped to economically handle short, intermittent, or long-term projects on a pre-set production schedule. We accomplish this with tight supervision, quality control, efficient communication, problem-solving abilities and extra assurances of meeting the customer’s demands and needs. FDA REGISTERED

PPA is located within easy access of the highway network in several areas throughout the Chicago land Area, with a strong and flexible work force, free cost and time estimates are provided. Please contact us for more information at 312-907-0071 or by e mail.

Thanks,
Rich Prykop
312-907-0071
http://packaging.prykop.com/

So then, after we emailed or sent through contact information, we opened our spreadsheet and placed in their contact information, which we were mailing it too as to job title, and then we went back to the site and added a little information about the company such as:

“About Us - WESCO Integrated Supply Powered by Bruckner (WIS) is a leading outsource company for indirect materials and supply chain services. We provide procurement services, supplier relationship management, storeroom programs, e-Procurement tools, savings programs, and transaction management. Our programs are tailored to meet specific customer needs. Our customers are leading global manufacturers. Our core competencies integrate commodity management, technology, cost saving programs and cost-efficient supply chain processes. Our people are the cornerstone for achieving performance. WIS provides flexible solutions to meet complex needs. We work closely with customers to design, plan, and implement cost effective programs, that deliver year-over-year value. WIS today is part of Wesco International, a leading distributor for electrical supplies, datacomm products and industrial automation equipment.”

And, then we sent the spreadsheet with contact information to Rich, so that if these companies called or wrote back, he would know how to handle them.  It took a while to do this, but today there is some more stuff that has to happen, just we can’t do it right now or I’m pretty sure we would go crazy.  We can only handle so much at a time.  Right now Rich is dressed and is ready to leave the house in twenty minutes.  He is talking to Bob on the phone because his game schedule is conflicting with the card schedule Bob is calling about.  Then I think he’s going to clean-up in back and then go out.  We were just in the part about discussing when and where he is going to be today.  Ok, good we’re brought up to date.  He is leaving by 10:15AM, going to see a customer, then see his mother, then he has to go to a game, and then he will be home by about 7 PM.  BUT, he just remembered that he didn’t do anything for dinner tonight.  I keep telling him I can handle it, but he doesn’t want to pay attention. 

Yeeks … he just showed me the frozen dinner I’m supposed to make.  I’m PRETTY sure that’s not going to happen, but I’m not going to tell him that.  I will just have some soup tonight.  Usually, that gets opened and eaten straight from the can.  Cooking is TOOOO hard for us and right now our frustration level is still high AND we’ll be seeing Dr. Marvin tonight so coming home too late.  We might also stop by for a sandwich.  We’ll have to see.  The house feels like too much pressure right now, because he can and will most likely interrupt my writing to tell me something or another.  Like this morning we wanted to put lotion on my feet and we rebel because we don’t like hand lotion.  *Sigh* Blah Humbug!

Just feeling so much grouchy right now … maybe we’re not over the meeting we had with Rich this morning.  I hope it doesn’t take too long to go away.  Now he’s calling someone.  I just want things peaceful again.  He’s checking his poker night game with the officials. 

Cats like it outside.  We opened the door when Rich was in the shower.  He was too cold and we are too hot.  They love it.  I don’t remember the last time they were out.  They are playing games with each other. 

Oh Lordy, we have a bad face on.  It’s now 10:20 AM and Rich is ALMOST out the door … he was doing calls and business in the living room, and then because he’s Rich’s he does things that are interruptive to our thinking like telling us to put the peanut butter away.  We just get in a frustrated space of hoping that he LEAVES!  We don’t mean to be so grouchy, but we’ve got to be able to settle down.  Maybe if I think REAL patiently.  Now he’s putsying in the kitchen.  We hear his jacket swishing.  Now he says he’s going and has the garbage and now?  Pswhoo!  The door finally shut.  We had said good-bye one last time and then we apologized and told him that we love him WHICH we do!  But, we confessed that our mind is being irritable.  He let us know that he wishes a calmer day for us.  We hope so too.  Just feel like the brain melt problem we have periodically where our eyebrows are squinted-up.

I know we took our medicine, maybe we’ll pick-up a little around the desk, use the washroom, get something to drink, and then maybe take one extra anxiety pill.  I HATE feeling like this and I know it goes to the hopeless feelings.  We told Rich while he was still in the living room that we were having problems and that they might have originated in his business meeting, but Rich being the person that he is … just said, “I’m not going to accept that.”  Then we said, “Fine, BUT WE accept it!”  Just so much negativity I can handle at one time and this one seems to have caught us by surprise.  BLAH!

Ok, ok … it’s a different ballgame.  It seems like a couple of hours have gone by.  It is now 12:20 PM.  We’ve been communicating with a few others and we’re definitely much more balanced feeling than before.  I think it started with taking the extra medicine to calm us down.  We had already talked to Linda, but then we gave her a few more notes.  We talked to CS in message, and all that seems good.  We figured out the birthday present since the dinner there didn’t get accomplished, and she talked about having some extra fabric she is having trouble finding a space for.  It is the OLD stuff, but sometimes it’s the BEST stuff, because it has no expectations yet on it.  WooHOO!!!  We also talked in message to Linda from Las Vegas.  She turns out to be in WI and we’re hoping she has a few free days to either stay with us or MINIMIALLY, is able to meet our sewing group.  She is familiar with 5 out of the six of us and there won’t be any trouble meeting Emily, because they are all connected through Ann’s quilt store.  We let CS and Linda know that we are inviting her, but will wait to see what she says before communicating to all.  Last time it was good and I don’t expect much different.  If she does come we’ll let her know that we’re celebrating linda, CS and Emily’s birthdays … that’s an extra fun part!  LV Linda doesn’t have a birthday until May so we’re all good there.

Joe had the most exciting news, but we’re going to wait a day or two on that until he makes an official announcement.  Good stuff there too!  AND, we’re getting a lunch out with him toward where he works in Schaumburg Friday afternoon.  WOOHOO!!!

 Wow!  So we’re feeling pretty good and in touch with people again.  We have a pretty small world and we like to know how it’s turning.  We also got a communication back from our accountant and she’s saying that the government appears to be allowing for taxes to be sent in about January 30th.  So that’s not too bad, it is only tomorrow.  It sounds like she has all the information she needs to complete them and is willing to ask her father about the fee.  Most likely it won’t change, but it really is an expense to have them doing the work.  We might have to switch back to H&R, but we’re thinking they would cost about the same.  It’s just  expensive to have taxes done, especially since I don’t think mine take any longer than ten to fifteen minutes.

Also while Rich was here, he signed some papers for our school loan and we talked over a few things.  We are going to take it to Dr. Marvin next and see what he has to say.  We need to remember too to write in our driver’s license on something.  That was down in the car when we did the forms, but I think at this next point, everything will be able to be sent out through Dr. Marvin’s office.  We’ll have to talk it over with him, and I’m not sure if there will be much time for anything else.  We’re still waiting on the bank and the medical place to withdraw the $75 we had spent last week in trying to work through issues on our credit report.  My account still shows that it hasn’t been removed, but we’re watching it carefully because after it is taken out there will only be $28.91.  We told Rich that that was the status of our account last week, but he hasn’t put the money in it to balance the account.  We’re hoping none of the incidentals will show-up and put us overdrawn, because this is something that can be fixed ahead of time.  Grrrr…
Shoot shoot!  We have to take out another $8.25 tonight for Dr. Marvin’s parking … that will bring the account to just over $20.  It looks like the other things have been taken out this month, and it should be ok until we get the disability check, but we need to be careful because we had written-out an additional $100 to finish paying the medical account.  In exchange the guy said it wouldn’t go on our credit report.  That be something at least.

Ok, starting to feel that tension again with having too much on our responsibility plate.  It is only 14 minutes from taking my afternoon medicine so maybe we will do that next.  We had some popcorn already so we’re good on food.  Ok, girls lets do that and try to calm down again, right?

DONE!  And, we also talked to Rich.  We wanted to tell him about Joe’s news and we wanted to know if he was going to be around on Saturday and if we couldn’t invite Thom over.  That be like a nice thing J  We had Maury over yesterday afternoon for lunch and we had a pretty good set of conversations, though there are problems we can’t talk about that are really on his nerves.  We’re hoping the best for him, but am afraid that it might get worse than getting better.  There were a couple other REALLY SMALL, but IMPORTANT things that happened while he was here.  He fixed the back TV for Rich – because it had gotten on the wrong setting, and then he helped me by getting the printer connected right again.  It was the same kind of thing where something had to be looked at and switched.  I think he updated a printer driver, and I had thought I’d done the same, but his way worked and that was a reason all on its own to celebrate.

I should probably think over a few more things since I don’t think I’ve written much since Saturday when we were going over our note to Rich or we haven’t done any free writing since Friday.  That is when we’d gotten the bug trying to fix things in our credit report.  As to an update AND from what we remember … we went to a show with Rich on Saturday.  I think we left a video of it.  It was called, “Silver Linings Playbook.”  I liked it a real lot.  It had to do with a guy who had OCD who had just gotten out of the hospital and his problems and of course another girl is met and she has MI problems to as does Dinero the guy’s father.  Maury knew how the main actors were as to show they’d last been in, but they were new to me and very likable.  It was a happy ending story and was in general just nice to be able to think of other kinds of thoughts as pertain to MI than is normally put-out there.  I think they did it really good, in that people with MI DO have differences, but we’re trying to get through life too and it is not without some stress.

We had used the tickets that we hadn’t used from last Mother’s Day.  Maury was saying that we must not love him and I know he’s teasing, but he knows some part of us feel bad too.  That’s not such a good thing. 

I think that Rich went out to games on both Saturday and Sunday.  We seem to have done some reading of our edits and we have been doing some work with the scraps.  That is the majority of the news.  We’re still talking to Linda most days, but sometimes less than more.

There is one more thing we are remembering now from later last week.  We had been writing and hadn’t really discussed the stuff that we were going through with Dr. M.  I’m sure we’re not going to remember a lot now, but it had to do with being on disability and thinking that we are such a disappointment as to being able to do things in spite of our disability.  There were times we’d been working or at school and I thought that those times he might be prouder because he’s always worn such a big smile about it.  But, it seems now that just getting out of the house is a big deal.  Like waiting to go out to the movies from May to January – that is at least eight months we didn’t feel like seeing an out of house movie.  Rich is trying to get us a little more interested in them because he renegotiated our Comcast for less money AND for more movies, but we’re still having trouble concentrating on that sort of thing.

We did watch a movie, I think on Sunday night when Rich was out called, “Margaret.”  That was a movie about a girl who had a part in an accident that killed a woman.  I liked that movie too and it really helped to be working on the scraps at the same time.  Rich wasn’t so happy when he got home and had to finish off the movie, but he made it.  He said that was the type of movie that he’d be REQUIRED to watch in high school.  Hehehe our guy is a little more toward action than chick flick.  He walked in and said, do you want me to change this … as if I hadn’t deliberately turned the show on.  And, it was like HEY!  I was watching that!  He’s just not used to me taking so much command over the TV.  Well, HE’s the one that wanted me more interested in the world.

As to Dr. Marvin again.  And, please don’t ask why this is so hard to talk about.  I wouldn’t be able to answer, but in general Dr. Marvin wasn’t going to give up on us and he talked about one of his biggest factors in knowing if he were successful was by how happy a person was.  I think he’s been watching us carefully trying to find a life balance for ourselves where we aren’t overwhelmed by life and all the negative things happening there.  Most likely, we’ll have to talk about trying to help Rich and what a bad experience that was, but we’re thinking we don’t really want to bother that much with it.  We’ll have to try again looking up companies, but we ok … this part is going to need going through Dr. Marvin, but we need to be able to cope better with stress and frustration.  That would be something we’re not very happy about.  I think we were in a complex situation with Dr. Marvin.  We needed to hear that we weren’t a waste.  Our sense of worth wasn’t very good thinking about dropping out of school for good, because it had been such an important goal for us.  We don’t believe in ourselves though and that’s a lot to contend with.  We need to be able to establish goals and keep up with them without getting shuffled because we’re under another or another emotional dilemma.  Just Rich yelling out loud this morning as he was talking over his version of the meeting was too much and we basically start shaking like a leaf.  I know that Dr. Marvin has been working with us for so long, but still it’s not fair that we are left with so many problems after all his work with us. 

That’s the kind of thing that we were feeling bad about with him.  It just hadn’t made sense.  We were feeling very apologetic for wasting so much of his time.  I could take an educated guess that Dr. Marvin would try to improve those sets of thoughts, and I think he did at the moment enough to give us the security of thinking he wasn’t going to give up on us.  Just we can’t get over what we feel like as to being a disappointment to him.  I think he reminded us that we were doing some of the forward direction stuff because it was something that we had wanted and that was good for us, but we wanted him to be proud of us too.  Even intellectually, we have not given him very much to go on.

Now when I say, well at least we’re writing more books, it’s put side by side with the other thoughts, and we think … could this be something we’re just working on for the moment, before we put it aside and try something else too?  It seems like writing is our go-to project, but it’s been put-off multiple times as we’ve tried other avenues.  Will we still be able to keep it up?  Even saying that though, we know that our minds think and we need an avenue to express ourselves, so even if the books weren’t publishable, we’d still probably be doing this, because like Dr. Marvin, this part seems to be helping our head cope. 

Our horoscope said something about writing out lists and following them today and then posting the lists.  I’m thinking of that right now as a direction.  There have been a few things we’ve been curious about over the last several weeks.  It seems that certain parts have tried to be more structured and organized, and then we as a whole somehow mess that up.  We are thinking now of there being a few things we want to check out.  A couple of them are on the phone, and then most likely on the computer, and then we wanted to find that thing we were doing before as a school, but we have no idea how to remember what and where that project was.  I suppose for the first instance though we could open-up our phone and catch the icons for those programs.  And, then we also want to note that we have something going on with Google, Outlook and the phone’s calendar so that might also show a bit of our past coordinating.  I think that one of the new icons or other might be connected there.  I’m also thinking now that there was some connection to all the new things with getting Evernote, Diigo, and Dropbox in order.  I would like to say that we’ve been making some progress with Dropbox.  It seems that our camera is now downloading to it so we are adjusting to opening it from our left sidebar when we go to open or save something.  We also know where it appears in our picture library, and we were glad that it was used just the other day by Thom. 

Basically, we’d sent him the link like to a few other people when the possibility of buying the house was still real.  It had like 167 pictures of EVERYthing from online and through our last walk through.  What we had noticed this last couple of days is that Thom went back to the link and did the little mickymousing around that allowed him to see the pictures.  Thom knows that getting a house is a big deal for us and I was proud that he shared our dreams with us by looking at the pictures.  All that was able to be done because of Dropbox.  So that made us feel good.  I’m not sure why after so much time we can’t organize our minds to work better together.  I would like to get to the point that if it went through our brain, we would be able to recall that information.  Times like now are tough to get back to things that were really interesting to us before, because we lose our mental links or signposts. 

We’ve been trying to think of the school connection to our online course.  Maybe first though we’ll look at the first couple of links we know how to get to.  Ok, good.  One is called Springpad, and the other is called Astrid.  I think they have something to do with ordering time or space, but we’re going to click now on that and see what we are able to recall.

Hmm, one seems to be (Astrid) a kind of task list and the other (Springpad) seems to be kind of a place to organize thoughts and ideas.  Maybe we’ll go find the online copy.  We’re pretty sure most of the stuff we connect to on the phone has an online site too.  Maybe it will help to get a bigger picture.  We don’t seem to have much information on file on the phone version yet, so we’re unsure how far we really got into those sets of thinking.  I was right though in that they seem to connect through Google, Android and Outlook.  Let me try one more time trying to figure out what that school course was.  That one is giving us the most mental problems.  Where do I look?

Oh My GOSH we found it!  The name of the program we’d been working on was called Canvas at  https://canvas.instructure.com/courses/771264

We went through about a half an hour trying to trace it down.  We had no idea of what month it had come up under, but we tracked down month after month on our blog until the name came up as a LMS … and SCORM  and Adobe that was a clue right after MOOC … we’d traced down those names by going through the aol mail for schools or courses.  Each step seemed to be just a little closer to what we were looking for.  I’m thinking now we’re just going to glance over that for a few moments.  We need to take our shower in ten minutes so we can leave here at 3PM to see Dr. Marvin.  Maybe he will be glad for us too to reconnect to this old information and maybe through that to the parts who had been working so hard on it.  I’m going to try though for a sec to just trace down a few changes that have come up to figure out where our minds focus took us.  We traced down the name of canvas to the first couple days of November about the time of Maury’s birthday.  So that’s step one

Ok, after Maury’s birthday and we’d found that Rich went fishing and we’d updated our intro to include Content DID 101 as including links to an opening page to our blog “About us” section and the “About Others in our Life” sections.  After that – about the 15th, we had gotten back from the quilting retreat.  That had had its good and bad, but for the most part we made a firm distinction between what we would and would not do with Ann and the Quilted Basket.  About then we were starting to get into the Christmas quilting projects.  Seems about in there sometime there were some problem thoughts about our Grandfather.  Maybe we can run this over with Dr. M.  We might have been planning by then to have the twins over early December. It seemed we had a good Thanksgiving and we started thinking about houses again through Rich’s Mom’s friend Pat.  The kids all coming over was a great success, and we were looking at applique.  So then, the twins came over, and then we made Rich’s boat applique for his birthday.  Somewhere into all this with the tree up we brought the ironing board into the living room and started working on scrap fabrics.  Appointments with Dr. Marvin became scattered.  It appeared that it was back to December 9th that we had been first writing about Astrid and Springboard.  I can’t believe we’ve left that for so long.  We must have gotten into Christmas shopping, because we came up to the parts of ordering our fabric palette and the 10 drawer cabinet.  We must have made the definite transition from computer work to sewing work.  The next thing was that Rich brought up a house because it got us to be looking at a place in Plano.  It had the 2 bedrooms upstairs and a nice loft, but wasn’t going to end up being useable by Rich’s mother.  It was for the record a $95,000 house.  Looking at it now – it has been for sale for 180+ days.

Hmm, just a thought here, but I wonder … I wonder if Rich … Hmm, call mike dote 847-772-8409  from Platinum recommended by Heidi Bobier at Ryland.  Ask about taking out a small loan through their Portfolio program.  Here we go again … (See December 16, 2012 post).

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