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Sunday, July 7, 2013

I think this is part of the beauty of talking to best friends ... both in support of the right track :) Relay - and then move forward

Saturday afternoon with Linda.

Ann
I worked today on writing and making sure the rest of the house was as perfect as I could make it to feel our own peaceful sense of order

3:57pm
Linda
Writing always makes you feel better and accomplished too. Having a clean house is always a restful feeling

3:58pm
Ann
yes ... until Rich came home ... spent 2 1/2 hours at mothers instead of his planned 1 hour and he said ... you are going to be angry. But we're bringing my mother to the party today ... I went ballistic in my mind ... and have been calming myself for the last hour - doubled my medicine

3:59pm
Ann
I just got quiet ... too angry to talk to Rich ... he's outside doing the weeds. That was the deal .. I mow the lawn and he does the weeds this week.
so tired of her drunken disorder taking over everything in Rich and our life

4:00pm
Linda
His mother can behave if she isn't drunk, right? I'm confused if she is in the home, why couldn't she be left there?

4:01pm
Ann
last night she was back in the hospital because we think they told her to sit and she insisted she was going to wheel self back to her room. She tripped, banged her head - it's all black and blue and now she is back in the nursing home still calling the game
I don't want to deal with her nonsense and being center of the attention all afternoon with 6 other people having lives she doesn't give jack shit about - and then listening to her rage feeling sorry for her sorry life
I'm so sorry ... Ive been trying to deal with this just feeling so much anger ... Probably throwback to my grandfather and father's alcoholism and ridiculousness

4:04pm
Linda
Hmmmm, not sure how this one will turn out. I do understand your anger and not wanting to have to deal with stupidity.

4:04pm
Ann
exactly.

4:06pm
Linda
Maybe do your best to remember about trying to help Rich out with his decisions concerning his mother. I'm sure it isn't going to be easy. He also has to think of you and just how much you are able to handle and what is really expected of you, it is after all his mother.

4:07pm
Ann
agreed ... and she's TOXIC. Big deal will be that he either take me home immediately when it gets ugly or I will drive myself. Not unreasonable 6 min away
I will support Rich, but not her directly


4:08pm
Linda
I think that is a fair deal, as long as both parties know the rules up front. Agreed, you have NO obligation to put up with her outbursts of rage or other foolishness.

4:09pm
Ann
 First smile in a long time ... thanks ... maybe you should squeeze in some quilting shopping heroics! I'm ready for a switch

Sunday Morning

Ann
Good morning ... are you there?

8:13am
Linda
Here now for just a few.

8:14am
Ann
k hows it going ... heard nice dinner - later MOSQUITOES!

8:15am
Linda
Slept well

8:15am
Ann

8:16am
Linda
Haven't had breakfast yet or showered, gonna be a slow day I think.
How were the fireworks?

8:16am
Ann
we stayed away from them
Watched the fireworks instead from Rich's mom

8:17am
Linda
That's the best way, away from the crowds, yet you can see them.
Don't know if I want to ask.....how was she?

8:18am
Ann
Got up and cleaned up the kitchen when the worst was happening ... basically Rich and his brother talked about her getting one beer ... she was adamant, but when Rich said no to second ... shit hit the fan ... BUT as her punishment she demanded to go back to the nursing home ... Ok, like no problem there. Rich and us went out then for a margarita (w/o her) and then went home to play  HAPPY ENDING

8:19am
Linda
I'm a real sucker for HAPPY ENDINGS!
So your night turned into a very good night

8:20am
Ann
She went off for a while tried to ally Mark and his girls into it (they'd been down by the river and came up to say goodbye), but then Mark looked at her and stated (in support of Rich) you came to drink not to socialize ... she realized she wasn't getting the support against blank blankety blank against Rich. Your right ... Rich and I handled things AND made a night of it

8:20am
Ann
Feel so bad for what he goes through

8:21am
Linda
I would feel bad too, but he needs to praised for his standing firm, something he seems to struggle with, with his mother.

8:21am
Ann
Obviously the situation she made it to be his fault and not hers. But we can move past it for now ... I'll blog about it, but the big thing is that we got through it with minimal damage AND we're now talking to you!
She's very manipulative turns from nice (gets the drink) to violently toxic when she doesn't get it ... blah
I kept that word in mind  so how bout you ... you have a good night back at the hotel?

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