Attention :)


Please also see Ann's Web Page called Multiplework

Dissociative Identity Disorder Blog

Updated! Please see Ann's Blog Roll in right sidebar by scrolling down for links to other People (approximately 100 bloggers) like us who currently (within 1 year) write about their Dissociative Identity in open Blogs. For additional support for Multiplicity our email is Aynetal3@aol.com and our Twitter account (@aynetal3), which lists approximately 300 Multiples. Keep looking for others - they are OUT there!

Thursday, July 4, 2013

We're already up to July 4th

Thursday, July 4th, 2013 @ 8:38 am

Good morning.  This is just us.  It has been an incredibly long time since we've written and it has come up at Dr. Marvin's that we would like to get back to it.  It has in the past been a way that we can be expressive and go over both our thoughts and feelings and especially after this last week or two we are more aware that we've got a lot to be going through that isn't getting processed otherwise.  I feel a little AA here, but we're making a statement here that it has been about a month and a half since writing and that yes our name is Ann and we are happy to be back.

We did skim over a few of our last entries and I'm not sure if we can do it justice but some of the things in general that have been happening is that we really went the distance with ebay, but after spending several hundred dollars we told Rich that we'd stop using the service without asking him.  It was something we maybe shouldn't have done, but until you do it, you don't really know the results.  I do appreciate the fabric that we got, but we'd also like to say we appreciate some of the fabric that CS and our mother gave to us.  Both included flannel baby blanket material and we will enjoy getting to that after we catch up on what the church has put out as to already cut squares.

We have continued with the church quilting, At this time we have completed 13 big quilts and 25 baby quilts.  Plus, we have finished off 34 back packs.  Some of the work was done by others on the back pack, but we'd done the ironing, a good part of the sewing and then finishing on all 34 bags by adding the tabs and sewing the last two seams up the side of the bag.  We will talk more about the church group as we go along, but wanted to point out that structurally all this time later it is one of the strongest factors in our life.  We're going to meet with the church group early this month - so will be meeting the 9th and 10th - Tuesday and Wednesday, and then we will meet on the 29th and 30th to be working on bags again.  Good stuff!

We also have continued to go to Carol's for Friday sewing although there wasn't any meetings in June ... it is now July 4th, and we're thinking that there will be meet-ups tomorrow, the 12th and the 28th.  No meeting on the 19th which is fine ... Rich will be gone that week and it is the week of our birthday so I'm perfectly fine with having some quiet time.

We've also been working on having Grandchildren over to the house for sleep overs.  So far Jade and Isa came one night, Ame came another, but we had to cancel Jasmine temporarily because of being in some really bad space, we are waiting to get her back on the schedule, and we have Austin on the schedule for the 13th.  I've loved that part of our life like the dickens and we're happy to be doing it though it is harder in that we want things to be perfect for them while they are here so it takes a little more energy.

We also had Rich's mother and Bud here for about 4 nights because we had gone through flooding in the area and water was up to their second step from the Fox river.  Utilities had been shut off in the neighborhood.  We can go back to that later to as to how that time had gone, but in general it was a very trying time because Rich's mother didn't like that she couldn't sit in the kitchen and chain smoke.  Again more later.

Another big deal of late has been the problems that Rich's mother and Bud have been going through.  Basically, Rich's mother drank too much and refused to eat, so she got very weak and needed to be hospitalized ... then she went to a nursing home called Tiller's and had a ton of problems ... mostly because she couldn't smoke or drink on site.  Then she went home for two nights and got so drunk that she ended up on the floor with a broken arm, and then of late ended up back in the hospital ... now she has just been released yesterday to another nursing home called Willowcrest where she can smoke outside on campus, but it was mostly because she'd run herself down in those two days and when it came time to be released from the hospital, Tiller's rejected her.  She couldn't come back because she'd burned that bridge.  And, then now is now.

Rich's brother Mark has been out a couple of times and is now staying at his mothers just for the fourth weekend.  We've seen him now a couple of times and it has been enjoyable having him in the area and that he can stop by our house.  I really enjoy the hostessing.

Another part of the saga with Rich's family is that back when Rich's mother was brought from the first hospital to Tiller's, Bud was supposed to drive her.  Because of the oxygen in the car he refused to let her smoke, so she opened the door while he was driving and stuck both her feet out like she was going to get out of the moving car.  Bud slowed down to the 40's, but since then after getting her to Tillers - for the next 5 weeks now Plus, he refused to come and see or talk to her.  This estrangement continues, but it gets worse.  The night before Rich's mom was to get home, Bud had a stroke, and ended up in the hospital to dissolve blood clots.  Two were pinpoint, but one was quarter size.  Since then he has been transferred over to Tiller's the one that Rich's mom can't go to and he will most likely be there for a while while he recovers.  He's lost some mobility and memory.  He is slow to come up with the words of what he is thinking and he seems to prefer thinking back to about the 60's - which obviously is like 50 years ago.

That's about that as to Rich's family.  We have had a few interactions with Brandy, Mark's daughter and that has been nice.  We will be seeing her and her sister at Mom's house on Saturday as Rich's brother is planning to celebrate Fourth of July over there with fireworks.  The worst part is that Brandy lost her partner so nobody is happy with that, but the reason they split up makes sense and all empathy goes to Brandy.

We have met with the Saturday group of girls once between now and the last time we wrote and it was VERY enjoyable ... it is one of the happiest things that we do.  We had postponed the meeting until June 15th, so Emily and Linda could have a chance to meetup with us too and that seems to have been a very good deal.  Linda still had to take part of that time to be meeting up with her family for her granddaughter's recital which worked out, and we also got to meet up with Los Vegas Linda who was in town helping her friend Ann at the quilted basket.  Ann had had shoulder surgery, AND the big news there was that Ann closed down the store.  There was a huge liquidation sale hosted by a company that sent a male to get rid of EVERYthing.  More later on that.  We were very pleased that CS gave us some time and completed a couple of the big church quilts and that she voluteered fabric toward our work sewing for the church.

Another big deal was that Rich and I spent time up north visiting our mother.  That turned out to be fairly good, but we have had problems with suicidal ideation since being back that is being worked out with Dr. Marvin.  I don't believe my mother did anything direct to cause problems, but we have problems with some of our parts in dealing with this family relation due to role models that have not been good in our past.  Again, we are working through things with Dr. Marvin and we may talk about this later too.

A really good thing that has happened as well was that the twins set-up a date and followed through so they were down here this last Sunday (the 30th of June).  We had a very good time and worked on our hostessing skills.  They seemed to like our place and when we showed them the guest room - before we introduced it to them as that, they'd guessed incorrectly that it was the master bedroom.  That thrilled us to pieces that they would think that highly of the room, but of course then we told them it was the guest room and where they would stay if they were to come down for an overnight.  WE really did work on that room so that it would be warm and welcoming.  At one point one of them said they were jealous of the space, but were probably being just nice.  We did hope they liked it because it is a bit of an affirmation that we - Rich and us made good choices.  I think we may actually have more space in our house then the twins in theirs, although they have a basement that we don't have.  I've never seen it, but could guess there's some good storage down there.

We continue being the domestic Goddess that Rich was looking for and have been very good at almost every day doing the goals that we've set out for.  I'm not as good about getting things done every morning before sitting down to relax, but we're consciously thinking of redoing that a bit.  It is a little different now sitting down to write first thing - we got a late start this morning sleeping into after 8 am, where normally, we are up about 6:30 am.  It seems we need to have our medicine and sit down to coffee and thoughts before we get back to house orientated, but then that could leave us vulnerable to not getting our Flylady duties done in a more timely manner.

Another thing we continue to work a is getting the grass cut.  Rich has had to cut it a few times, but in general we are still the main grass cutter.  Rich did get a weedwacker and blower, but so far those have been his tasks and it is hit or miss if he gets to them.  It seems hard for us to stand and walk sideways with the weed wacker, but we'll continue to work through this.

Another thing that has been coloring the time since we last wrote is that Rich has been having problems with his hip and right knee.  He is walking with a distinct limp and we wish that it was different.  This week he finally talked to AN insurance person, but he was not very forthcoming as to changes coming up with Obama care.  We know that enrollment is coming up in October and that the program really kicks off in January, 2014, so it would be like waiting another 6 months before he can get some help.  We're not sure what else to do there, but it is grating each time he stands up or sits down or walks in that he looks like he is in very much pain.  Our heart breaks for him.

I haven't seen a doctor now for a couple of years - since we lost our Blue Cross/Blue shield and went on Disability and Medicaid.  We need to check the date we officially were put on disability because we need to watch the two year difference where we can get Medicare insurance.  Most likely we'll need supplementary, but I don't see us getting off Medicaid any time soon.  I think we pay in about $100 a month, but it is well worth the support because we can still see Dr. Marvin.  It would probably cover us seeing Dr. Albright - if she's still at UIC, but so far there hasn't been any special problems.

We have seen a dentist about 6-7 months ago and we did get a dentist credit card for about $4,800 for emergencies, but they wanted to charge over $8,000 and we didn't have that kind of money nor felt that we could pay off a $4,800 credit card bill.  It is still there when we get to a pain point where it absolutely needs to be done, but we're in general just trying to watch it.

One of the problems that we've come up with at this house is the discovery that our roof really needs to be replaced.  The warranty people decided that they'd only contribute $300 toward it, but we've had two estimates coming in that state it is $7-7,500 to repair and replace includig the skylights, but not over the sunroom, breezeway or garage.  We understand there are nail pops there that have to be cared for and we are closer to making Rich understand there is no way that we're going to put up with him being up on the roof especially with his hips and knee problems.  We are a bit at a standstill because we want a complete estimate on the entire roof, the ...

Hmm, had to hold that thought because Rich's brother backed-up in the driveway which sent us scurrying for cover ... we had been sitting in the sunroom in our pajammas.  Yeeks!  By now he's come and gone.  He was on his way to his mother's to get her a smoke.  That will buy Rich some time.  He says he will now go over about 4 pm.  And, now Mark is invited to dinner tonight between about 6-6:30 pm.  Rich likes to make ribs.  Good good.  In the process we agreed to doing the lawn today with Rich about 2 pm.  We only shared the task once before - and at that time I had the long hard cutting grass part and he had the shorter easier trimming part.  Maybe I will still cut all the grass this time, but he will do the weeds and get the stuff down on the ground to prevent insects from getting too close.

I'm now dressed and we ate a late breakfast and then set Rich up to be doing his piece parts.  He's been watching fishing all morning, so we can't feel too bad for him.  He's more relaxed today because he didn't start off over at his mothers.

I am a bit in a wondering mood ... think we might go sew for a while.  This has been a good start again for me .. BTW as to that incomplete sentence a few paragraphs ago, the deal would be that I will co-sign on a loan, but Rich has to get a price for the WHOLE roof, plus the windows that need replacing AND the work necessary on the little extended part in our bedroom that is for sitting.  THEN we will consider getting a loan ... basically, I'm not getting a loan - and burning out that bridge and then finding we need $4-5000 more than asked.  I think one thing that is going to hold that up is that Rich hasn't done his taxes this year.  That is going to go down bad, because that's the first thing they will ask for to get an idea of his financial abilities to pay back.

Hmm, thinking here now ... is there anything else on top of this list that I would like to leave a catch-up marker for?  Kitties are ok, still worrying over some of their habits.  Kids are ok.  Joe will be in a 4th of July parade today for the dojo, Maury just put an offer down on a house, not sure how that went, and Thom is still out of communication.  We only see blurbs from Duyen that are in Vietnamese so we don't know how she's doing though there is enough pictures of her with her friends that make it seem as if she's happy ... Nothing on how she and Thom are getting along.  I do know that Thom's son is being cheated out of having a father.  That's not fair by any means.  Maury I believe is on vacation to Arkansas this weekend.

Hmm, 10:57 am ... think we're going to get going.  Til the next time ... thanks for coming back :)

(20,409/4,656)

No comments:

Post a Comment