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Dissociative Identity Disorder Blog

Updated! Please see Ann's Blog Roll in right sidebar by scrolling down for links to other People (approximately 100 bloggers) like us who currently (within 1 year) write about their Dissociative Identity in open Blogs. For additional support for Multiplicity our email is Aynetal3@aol.com and our Twitter account (@aynetal3), which lists approximately 300 Multiples. Keep looking for others - they are OUT there!

Friday, May 1, 2015

Little things falling between the lines



Tuesday, April 28, 2015 @ 10:04 am

I have just a short amount of time before I leave, so we figure we’ll put down a few things and see where it leads us.  I always seem to feel pressure going out of the house and today is not much different. Dakota and I will be driving to Dr. Marvin’s in less than an hour – BLAH for THAT drive.  We saw something for Dakota though that rich allowed us to order – in is a piece of canvas like cloth that goes between the front seats in the vehicles and back.  As soon as we conjure up our credit cards etc.  We’ll order it … I never know where anyone puts things.  It would be better to have our license and insurance and registration before we drive.  Hmm, maybe we should look again?  Grrr…

Yay!!!  It was in Dakota’s bag – I’d checked there earlier this morning, but didn’t see it.  Pswhoo that was a ugg kind of moments – had to trace back where I’d seen the device and then work my credit card because they had a default one for us that was different … it seemed to go through though so we’re all good.  Yes, got confirmation AND we got out of there without spending extra which could happen easily enough.

Good Ann

I will be so much more comfortable if we can keep the dog in the backseat.  They were about $13 apiece so we got one for Rich’s SUV and ours.  It will be better than Dakota sitting in the front seat with us … last time I hit the brakes and he was pressed up against the front window.  He was ok, but it just doesn’t make sense if I can keep him in the back.

Time minus 32 minutes.  Bags all packed hmm, where is our phone?  Needed to charge it, but won’t be good in 32 minutes.  Dakota will go out in about 15 minutes.  It’s his time to shine ;)  He usually follows my movements carefully, but now he’s like way activated.  He sees the signs of us going toward Dr. Marvin’s – we’ve coached him AND he sees us getting dressed, doing the bag, using the washroom, etc.  There’s no doubt in my mind he knows.

We’ve got a picture of him in our FB yesterday just staring at me in the sunroom from a couple feet away on the couch.  He’s used to watching me close – we made a comment on him sneaking up on us because I’d just taken a picture of him on the other side of the couch and he seemed to be creepin in ya know?

I’m not sure what we’ll talk to Dr. Marvin about today … I think something will be said about getting sick, but we’ve updated him yesterday after talking to Dr. Albright, don’t think there’s much left to do there.  I guess we should be talking about feeling depressed lately.  We had a little spurt last week with the web site, but then after we finished the “About Me” section, there didn’t seem too much we wanted to do – yah we were sick in there, but it was the last set of thoughts going into that and first set coming out of it. 

I sort of have the feeling that we don’t really have anything to say or teach about multiplicity … lots of our stuff has been like this just writing about ourselves.  We have the mode where we want to teach, or go through learning processes, but we’re not sure where, nor do we know our audience – the people we want to communicate to.  We could be setting up a dinosaur of a program – that be a good thing rather than no-thing.  We’d like it to be used, but we’d have to say we knew something first, right? 

I’ve been trying to bridge over the thought as tied to the mind map.  It’s always seemed more a resource to us and I know that not long ago, Dr. Marvin and us talked about writing, where it might fall as a resource, but the idea was to think and communicate – at least that’s what we’re thinking right now.  For a while we were working with Plural Activism, because we thought we were fighting the same battle – just getting multiples to think healthy thoughts by making choices, reasonable decisions and being responsible for themselves.  We were hard-placed to be told we weren’t healthy because we were DID.  I think the bottom line there has to be that it lays in the eyes of the beholder.  I think there is something to say about the medical professions discussion on multiplicity and it usually far exceeds what else is out there on multiplicity.  I don’t like being told if I believe in that that I can’t be healthy because they (medical community) think so little to objectify us.  I think it’s more objectionable to have friends think less of you because you are not believing what they do – though their arguments are very subjective and inaccurate. 

We worked very hard with Dr. Marvin – and doing the podcast so we could find some ground between being a multiple and working through the kinks of having it be considered a disability.  My own doctor doesn’t think I’m disabled – so why after all that effort should I believe them?  That would mean we’re much less of ourselves than we are knowledgeable of.  We’ve come too far in our thinking and doing processes – to be told to lie down because my own community thinks were sick for holding a viewpoint different than them.

10:47 am – done with that … Just took Dakota out and he did all that he hoped we would.


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